It's been a long time since I've felt the desire to write. But I think all I was missing was a little bit of inspiration. And he walked in and out of my life. Just like that.
Like he said, we were both similar and opposites all at the same time. He pulled at my inner child. He encouraged my weird. Which has been hidden from those that have walts into my life for the past ten years. He inspired a different magnitude of excitement and it was beautiful.
He made me smile with his stupid adorable humour. He made me want to put aside my pride and break down my walls.
He made me fall and fly all at the same time.
And just like that, it was over before it began. And I'm angry? Sad? Heartbroken. All mixed in like a painful disease that I want cured.
We weren't ready for each other, he felt. Of course I digressed. But I knew screaming and shouting it would be useless.
He said maybe down the line, once we've fixed ourselves. He didn't understand I wanted him, imperfections and all. But I also understood that he wanted to preserve what could have been. And that destroyed me.
I'm not going to lie. It's been ages since I've cried over someone. Let alone never cried over someone I didn't get to have. Stupid right? Yeah. I thought so too.
So here is me venting, trying to get back to my numb and meaningless ways. Wish me luck.
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